I Guess We Will Call These ‘Issues’

I swear Gabriella knows when I write a nice little post about her. She decides to be the COMPLETE opposite that day. She is such a goof! Last night was one of those crazy nights…that I’m not the biggest fan of. She was up a ridiculous amount…and then ready to start the day at 5am. Normally I wouldn’t care, I’m usually up at that time anyways…but after a night of maybe three hours of sleep, I was begging her to go back to sleep.

Needless to say my begging didn’t work out too well, and my girl was up & at ‘em…which meant Mommy was too. 😉

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^one of my favorite pictures which TOTALLY shows her little attitude & sass 😉

I’m not quite sure why she was a bit ‘off’ last night/ this morning…but I have a feeling it’s her little teeth. She is teething REALLY bad now, and her gums are white- which I know means those teeth are trying to pop through. She’s also really enjoying being held sometimes, which is odd, because usually she just wants to MOVE around on her own. I know a big part of teething can be the need for extra Mommy love- aka “hold me all the time Mommy.” I love the extra snuggles, because, like I said, usually she tries to push herself off me so that she can crawl around.

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Anyways, as I said yesterday, I LOVE everything about this age- six months is an awesome age! But there are a few things that we need to work on with our little lady.

So the latest thing with Miss Gabriella is REALLY BAD attachment issues. As in, Craig or I must be with her at all times. She doesn’t want anyone else to hold her, except for us. I went up to visit my parents last weekend, and I went to give G to my Mom & she started SCREAMING. I thought it was because I handed her off the minute I walked in the door so that I could finish unloading all of the stuff (You need a TON of stuff for a baby…it’s insane), and since she had not seen my Mom in a bit maybe she was scared..? NO. She continued screaming when I got all of the stuff and was standing right there next to her.

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^the last time my Mom saw her, on Easter, she was fine.

She wouldn’t stop screaming until I held her. This lasted all day. :/ I was sad because I know how much my Mom wanted to hold her, but Gabriella just didn’t want any part of it.

The next day she did a little better, she still just wanted me to hold her, but she did warm up to my parents a bit. I was happy about that because I felt bad that she was being a little stink the whole time.

This isn’t the only time. She saw a few friends of mine & she did the same thing. 😦 Even though I was standing right there next to her & she could see me, she still would just cry until I picked her up.

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^she’s really sweet, I promise 🙂

I had to keep apologizing to anyone who tried to hold her.

Lately I can barely take a shower. I used to put her in her seat & give her a toy & she would be fine…not anymore. My 2 minute showers have now turned into 30 second showers. I don’t think anyone wants to be around me…I mean who wants to hang out with someone who just ran 10 miles & barely had a chance to shower?! 😉

I did have a minute to do some research on this & I found out it’s pretty common. The attachment issues are in full force during this age…and it’s OK! It just means that she sees us as her comfort & safety, which is fine by me. That’s a GOOD thing! We want her to know that she is safe. BUT there are ways to work on the attachment issues, otherwise she will never want to go to anyone. Of course the big one is socializing her. I actually found some ‘Mommy groups’ on Meet up, only because most of my friends that are my age do not have kids & I would love to find some other Mommys in my area- not just for Gabriella’s sake, but for mine too. It would be nice to have other Moms to discuss things with & just hear about their experiences.

Another thing I read was to play Peek a boo with her. It shows her that Mommy & Daddy may ‘leave,’ but they always come back.

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We may have the attachment for a while, but it’s usually just a phase & should pass once she is more socialized & knows certain people. We have a friend that just adores Gabriella, and she is planning on visiting her more often so that she may be able to baby sit her eventually- I want G to know that she is ‘safe’ too.

So the next ‘issue’ isn’t really an issue anymore. She still won’t take a bottle, which means I’ll be breast feeding for a year, which I wanted to do anyways…but I was hoping I would be able to pump too. It also means that I don’t get a break with the feedings- I can only be away for up to four hours…if that. And now with the attachment issues going on, sometimes I really can’t leave.

I tried sippy cups, and she is REALLY good at taking them. She chugs water like no other.

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But she refuses to drink milk in them. I put a QUARTER of an ounce of milk in- mixed with about 3 ounces of water & she would NOT drink it. (I tried both cold & warm) I dumped it out & filled it up with water…and she drank it, no problem. HOW in the world can she taste that little amount?! I don’t even think I could!! Haha!!

But here are my thoughts on the bottle thing…for some reason this is how it is supposed to be. – you know the saying, ‘Everything happens for a reason.’ That’s how I feel. There is a reason behind it all, and I’m just going to leave it like that.

I’m LUCKY & blessed that she latched like she did- right out of the womb she latched like a pro! I have never had any issues with it- and never had any dry or cracked nipples (sorry if TMI, just speaking the truth 🙂 ), which I know a LOT of women experience & it sounds absolutely horrible.

I told Craig that a year without a night out (without having to hurry home to feed her), or a night away is TOTALLY manageable! Honestly, it’s NO BIG DEAL! Of course we would love to have a night away, but we can wait until she is no longer nursing. We’ve gone six months, we go do six more! 🙂

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There is no need to stress ourselves out or Gabriella.

The last thing was something I mentioned yesterday- how much she still gets up at night. I know breastfeeding babies typically wake up more & need to eat more often than formula fed babies, but I think she is waking up more than normal. I feel like she can skip at least one of her nightly feedings. She’s in bed by 7pm, then up to eat at 10pm, 1 or 2am, 4am & then up for the day around 6:30/7am. It’s a LOT…and it’s a lot of no sleep for me. This Momma enjoys her sleep! 😉

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It’s something I’ll discuss with her doctor this week & see what he suggests. I hope he has some good advice. 🙂

All in all, I would say we are VERY lucky to have our sweet daughter that we do. She is our WHOLE world. I seriously don’t know what we would do without her. So she is a bit attached to us?! We can TOTALLY manage that. 😀 & lack of sleep??! At this point in the game, I’m SO used to it, I honestly don’t remember getting an uninterrupted nights sleep. And THAT’S OK! Some nights I actually CRAVE the time with her in the middle of the night. My cousin told me I would, and she also told me to savor these times because they don’t last long. The lack of sleep is worth it.

Moms: Did your child ever experience attachment issues? How old were they before they overcame it?

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9 thoughts on “I Guess We Will Call These ‘Issues’

  1. Not a mom but a nanny and I’ve commented before (about not taking a bottle)! The little girl I nanny is 10 months old and has such bad attachment issues (to me and her parents). But there are times when she has to be with grandparents (example I was away and they were both in a bridal party). And we have found that she’s fine within 5 mins of us being gone its when we are there and not holding her and someone else is that she’s so upset because she can see you!!! It’s devastating for the grandparents and I totally know what you mean about feeling guilty! But trust me if you guys had to be somewhere she would do great with your mom once you were gone. I know it’s harder for you since breastfeeding and no bottles! We have her grandmother come once a week and I leave early so they can spend time together but every week she balls her eyes out when I hand her over and leave and within 5 mins she’s fine! As for how long I’m sure every baby is different but she’s been doing this for at least 5 months :(. It definately helps getting her in social situations though we go to classes, playgroups and the same parks every day so she sees the same faces and babies all the time. She would even cry if other babies came near her :(. Each month she seems to get less and less attached though. Good luck and like you said it won’t last forever so soak it up 🙂

    • Hey Maria! I remember you 🙂
      Thank you for the re-assurance. Sometimes I wonder if she would do the same thing. Only because if I am out of the room she is typically ok. But then other times she is not.
      I think it’s great that the grandmother comes over once a week so they can get closer, but I know it has to be hard for you to leave…but hopefully it will get easier with time.
      Thanks for still reading, even though I don’t post regularly, I appreciate your comments & advice 🙂

  2. We’re still dealing with attachment issues, but they aren’t as bad as before. He does GREAT with others when I’m not around but once he sees me its like “oh there’s Mom, she’s my favorite so I only want to be by/with her” 🙂
    Being around others will help I’m sure! 🙂
    How was your success with meetup? My friend loved it and recommended it to me but so far I haven’t any success with it :-/ I went to one meet up and got stood up, the ladies who were scheduled to attend had things comes up (which I understood) but it totally made me not as enthusiastic about the whole thing. 😦
    & Teething is the WORST, it’s SO exciting to see them get teeth, but the teething process itself is NO FUN AT ALL. Teething changes their moods, appetite, sleep schedule/habits..but like you said no matter what, it’s SO worth it.

    • YES!! She does that too. it’s like if she can’t see me, it’s better…usually.
      I actually have not attended a meeting yet, but I may go tomorrow. I just wish I had more people that I knew near by with babies, only because I feel like I’m stepping into a group that has already formed, ya know?
      That sucks about your experience…I’m sorry about that 😦 I would be in the same boat though, it would definitely make me less excited about trying to attend another meet up.
      I will let you know how things go!

  3. Your G is so super sweet! I love reading this and thinking of 3 months ago! Attachment, YES. We have that too. But it gets better. I just started dumping her off at the nursery at church and walking away… she was screaming of course but eventually after the 3rd Sunday she went willingly and had a great time. Breaks my heart to hear her cry though.
    As far as feeding at night- every baby is totally different. Luckily my G was sleeping 7-7, but she was formula fed (not by choice, by her being skinny mini and me not producing hardly anything). I would try feeding her a little less each time. Have you read Baby Wise? They say to feed her a couple minutes less each night (or a couple ounces less) until they are done to an ounce and you can eliminate.
    I’m not baby expert, but I read that book and loved it.
    Good luck with all of it but ENJOY! Gentry is now moving all around and I need to go back to taking her naps with her!
    emma @ amomrunsthistown.com

    • Oh so GOOD to hear this!!!!
      I would try feeding less, but I don’t know how much she is eating at each feeding..since it’s all breastfed, no bottle :/
      I have read Baby Wise- mixed feelings on it. But I wish I had some idea how many ounces she was taking- would be nice to know..and would be nice to let Daddy do some night feedings too 😀

  4. My son is 8 months old now and we haven’t had any attachment issues. Anyone can hold him and he could care less. Sometimes people steal him away from me so much that I wish he would cry so that I could get him back! Although, probably, not really. I think ever kid is different. My son goes to my sister’s for daycare so that might help. Sometimes when I get home from work my son cries until I hold him and he wants nothing to do with his dad, but I think it’s more of a milk/hunger thing! Good luck – I’m sure it’s hard for your family or friends when she wants only you, but it is completely normal and most kids grow out of it.

    • I’m sure daycare helps- I know that she would be better with the attachment stuff AND with the bottle if she was going to daycare. I do feel lucky that I get to stay home with her, but I do feel like daycare is very beneficial in many ways too.

  5. aww my daughter just turned 5 months old and she is still waking up in the night every hour or two! sometimes we get a four hour stretch but i have learned to just go with the flow and enjoy it. it helps that my husband is so helpful! she is also starting to get more clingy! i could see how it would be frustrating long term but it is kind of nice to know she only prefers you! 🙂

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